QUERY AND SYNOPSIS
Writers frequently inquire about the best approach when trying to find an agent or publisher. The process involves writing the dreaded query letter and a synopsis. While not all agents ask for a synopsis, I didn't run across any who said not to send one, so I included it with every mailing I sent out. Below are the query letter and the enclosures (except for the sample chapters) I sent out when I was trying to find an agent for my first published novel, Cold White Fury. I had a second version of the letter that did not reference enclosed chapters for those agents who specifically listed a query only. The package I sent out included a query letter on my letterhead, a synopsis of the book, and an author bio sheet. The query letter might have been better if I'd avoided words like "proclivity" and had listed my writing credits there rather than in the cutesy bio sheet. The synopsis violated a hard and fast rule in that it did not reveal the book's conclusion. Despite all that, it worked. I queried a total of 30 agents and the one who took me on was #29 on my list. She sold the book to HarperCollins for a 10K advance five weeks later. I present all of it here exactly as it was written, warts and all.
THE QUERY
(Date)
(Agent
Name)
(Agency)
(Address 1)
(Address 2)
Dear
(Agent Name):
The story follows a week in the life of Jennifer Bolton and her eight-year-old son,
Tanner, as they unravel a deadly plot created by a secret group intent on their own warped
and perverse form of selective breeding. The
scientific discovery enabling this group to carry out their plans was discovered by
Jennifer's husband eight years earlier, a discovery he paid for with his life. Now it is Jennifer and Tanner's lives that are at
risk as they become locked in a life-and-death struggle to find key bits of information
that Jennifer's husband had hidden. Through a
freakish combination of coincidence and medical mismanagement, Tanner develops unusual
paranormal abilities that both aid and impede their efforts.
Suspense thrillers containing realistic scientific evidence continue to be a great
topic of interest to today's readers. My book
contains actual scientific knowledge, realistic medical scenarios, and a touch of the
occult - to snag the New Age interest. I have
a varied medical background to lend authenticity to the medical components and have
carefully researched both the areas of current scientific study as well as the realm of
paranormal science.
I have enclosed a brief overview of the book along with some sample chapters and an
author bio. The entire manuscript is complete
and available for review. I have also
enclosed a self-addressed, stamped envelope for your convenience in responding to my
query. The sample chapters are copies and
need not be returned. If you decide you are
not interested, please dispose of them.
I look forward to hearing from you and thank you ahead of time for your
consideration.
Sincerely,
Beth A.
Amos
Enclosures:
Overview
Sample Chapters
Author Bio
SASE
THE SYNOPSIS
Overview
Serotonin, a hormone and neurotransmitter, is responsible for modulating the body's
emotions and drives, particularly aggression. Noradrenaline,
another hormone, is responsible for triggering the adrenal response to danger: the
"fight or flight" reaction. Studies
have demonstrated a link between low levels of serotonin, and either unusually low or
unusually high levels of noradrenaline.
The first combination, low serotonin and low noradrenaline, creates a state of
underarousal which can lead people into taking greater and greater risks in order to
achieve the high or thrill associated with surges of adrenalin. The end result is predatory, cold-blooded
violence.
The second combination, low serotonin levels combined with high noradrenaline
levels, can lead to episodes of explosive, hot-blooded violence when triggered by the
pushing of an emotional "button". This
type of violence is an all-consuming fury that can be compared to dropping a lit match
into a puddle of gasoline.
Scientists have recently uncovered a rare mutant gene that affects the delicate
balance of these two chemicals. (recent
articles available)
Cold White Fury also incorporates scientific studies that suggest that the
pineal gland - a small, walnut-sized gland located in the mid-brain area - may be
connected with paranormal abilities such as psychokinesis, ESP, and poltergeist activity. Often called the "third eye" in frogs
and lizards, the pineal gland is responsible for the regulation of certain biorhythms,
such as the onset of puberty in humans. Studies
of paranormal phenomenon suggest that the right amount of stimulation to the pineal gland
may lead to the development of these types of abilities.
The story opens with Tim Bolton, his wife, Jennifer, and their six-month-old son,
Tanner, taking a much needed vacation. Their
vacation ends prematurely and tragically when their car is involved in an accident with a
fuel tanker on the winding mountainous roads bordering Virginia and West Virginia,
resulting in a fiery explosion. Tim Bolton,
pinned inside the car, is killed in the explosion. His
wife manages to get herself and her son out of the car and tries to get away before the
tanker explodes. Though she makes it far
enough to survive, she is severely injured, and Tanner suffers an unknown injury when a
white-hot sliver of metal enters his brain through the soft spot on the back of his head,
settling in the mid-brain area near the pineal gland.
Because the hot metal cauterized the surrounding tissue during its entry, Tanner
suffers no immediate ill effects and no one is aware of the presence of this metal sliver.
The story resumes eight years later, when Tanner Bolton suffers a fall from his
bicycle that brings him to an emergency room for treatment.
An MRI is performed, and the powerful magnet ionizes the metal sliver in Tanner's
brain, moving it just enough so that it is resting against the pineal gland. The result of this physical and magnetic
stimulation to the cells of the pineal gland creates some interesting and unusual
abilities in Tanner.
As the story develops, Tanner finds he has the ability to read people's thoughts
and later, to move objects with his mind. He
also starts hearing the voice of his long-dead father, who tells him that the accident in
which he died was no accident - Biogen had him murdered.
When Tanner starts demonstrating his new-found abilities in front of his mother,
she becomes concerned that he is suffering from an acute psychological problem along with
the frightening physical symptoms he has been displaying: fugue states and seizures. She solicits the help of a physician and a
psychiatrist, not knowing that both of them are connected to the very people that had Tim
killed.
As Jennifer struggles to help her son, we meet the other central characters in her
life: her best friend and confidante, Carny
Callahan, who is not what she seems; her current boyfriend, Evan Reeves, a successful and
handsome criminal lawyer; Eric Singleton, an attractive young doctor who takes a
more-than-professional interest in Jennifer and Tanner's well-being; and Jennifer's
mother, Jane Harren, a woman Jennifer has been estranged from for nine years because of a
dark and deadly secret.
We also meet some of the victims of the group's deadly plan: Barry Hanover, who
loses his temper in a final fit of intense fury and kills his entire family and then
himself; Brian Wentworth, a seventeen-year-old, spoiled rich kid with a sociopathic
personality; and Senator Edward Tranley, the new Presidential hopeful whose support of
programs to aid various minority groups make him a prime target for elimination by this
racially intolerant group of fanatics.
As Tanner's paranormal abilities grow, so does the danger. Jennifer soon realizes that she can trust no one
as numerous attempts are made on her life, and those she thought she could trust, betray
her. Her plight escalates into a
life-and-death race with the group to find the information hidden by her dead husband.
Based on real scientific discoveries made during the past year, and utilizing the
still unknown world of paranormal experiences, Cold White Fury is a suspenseful
thriller designed to keep the reader on the edge of their seat.
AUTHOR BIO
About
the Author
Beth Amos is a graduate of Mercer County Community College in New Jersey where she
obtained her nursing degree, and Virginia Commonwealth University in Richmond, Virginia,
where she obtained a degree in Health Administration.
While at VCU, she took a variety of writing courses and studied under published
authors such as Sloan Wilson and Wesley Gibson.
Amos has had several articles published in HOSPICE, a nationally published
journal for professionals working with the terminally ill, and in Life Health, a
Richmond area health care magazine. She also
produces a monthly newsletter for the Virginia Association for Hospices.
Though born in New York, Amos has lived in eight other states throughout the
country. A single mother, she now resides in
Richmond, Virginia with her teenaged son and a menagerie of pets.